How about the people who show conceit? Is their self-image intact? In all the years of doing personnel work and coaching in customer service that type of personality has been the most interesting to study. So many people have trouble taking instruction and instead resist being told anything. A neighboring trait is defiance of authority, which is getting more common to find. It may be covert resistance too.
This type of behavior stems from one of two origins: first, the kind of person who received inordinate and perhaps undeserved praise and came to believe his or her own press. This is the mentally puffed up person. When I see this is a sample, if I have opportunity, I ask the writer questions about his upbringing.
The more common reason for conceit is shown by the person who did not receive healthy recognition in early years and on into adulthood. The fact is without approval coming from others, which is a healthy way to get it and feel good, the person craving recognition but doesn't get it, figures out a way to give it to himself. It can provide some real motivation.
The question is: does it work as a spur to help him produce in his life? Or is just hot air?
In industry, such people take credit but don't give it. In their minds it was their effort, not a team effort, that created a successful outcome. They consider the "little people" as a way to get the job done for them. Then those people cease to exist until the next time they need them. And if things get fouled up, guess who gets the blame? You probably can think of a few people like that who have been around you.
Their feeling of self-importance comes out through their pores. They don't have to verbally express it; their demeanor shouts it. That attitude emotionally alienates people who have to deal with them. They are left to live alone in their own ivory towers, patting themselves on the back as they board their mental elevator. But, it seems like they never figure out why that happens to them.
Again, there are ways to evaluate the trait of vanity in writing. But, the easiest way to see it is to take note of the upper extensions of the small letters d and t. As a rule of thumb, when those ascenders are 3 times as tall as the middle zone you are seeing vanity. Huge capitals, especially when they are elaborate as well reveal inordinate self-admiration.
Does it mean vain people are always dominantly displaying how smart they think they are? No, it does not. Behavior may mask the bloated self-concept. But it doesn't take long for others to pick up it from other clues. It is hard to be humble when one feels so great and if humility is fake it bursts like a pin in a balloon.
Comments